Do you have a secret that you're ashamed to share with others? It might be something that happened in your childhood, or something you've done, or something that you've been through. You keep this secret to yourself because you're afraid of other people finding out about it. You're scared that if people find out, they will look down on you or realize that you don't really have it all together. You're terrified they will discover you're not perfect.

But sharing your story is truly one of the most powerful (and empowering) things you can ever do.

Have you noticed that when someone shares something with you that makes them vulnerable, you suddenly feel closer to that person? It's a classic finding in research on romantic relationships: vulnerability builds closeness and trust. When you put yourself out there, and someone reciprocates by supporting you and perhaps even sharing something from their own experiences, you feel closer to that person.

Yet so many of us feel far away from each other. We're disconnected. We put up walls and facades, we wear masks to keep people from seeing our imperfections. But it's your imperfections that make you special. Your faults provide you with an avenue to connect with others.

It took me 5 years to get up the courage to write my book, "The Antidepressant Antidote." Why? I was terrified of people finding out that I had taken antidepressants for 6 years. What would my colleagues think? What would my extended family think? What would my friends think? For years I suffered in silence because I didn't want people to think I was crazy.

But guess what?

I finally summoned up the courage to share my story - and not one person has told me they think I'm crazy. Instead, people are thanking me from the bottom of their hearts for sharing what I went through, because my story helps them feel less alone.

Think about it. What were ancient humans doing when they weren't hunting, eating, or mating? They sat around a fire and shared stories. It's our stories that help us connect. People don't love you for being perfect. They love you for being you.

This week I was interviewed on Dr. Charles Glassman's radio show "Killer Health Care." Dr. Glassman started out by saying how happy he was that I was so open about my experiences in my book. He said, "Many people out there say they're an expert in something, when all they've really done is study a topic. You are truly an expert. Not only have you researched this topic, but you've lived it."

Know that you too are an expert at what you've been through. Don't be afraid to share your expertise with others. You don't need a Ph.D. to tell your story.

This week I gave a talk at a local high school for a group of students with special needs. I shared the story of what I went through in my childhood, and how high school had been somewhat difficult for me. Slowly, the students started opening up about how they had been bullied and how they often felt sad and alone. I shared tips about things that have helped me get through tough times, like yoga and meditation. It was truly humbling to know that my story helped these teens open up about what they've been through.

In his book "Monetize Your Passion," Rich German talks about how the old model of the perfect guru who sits up on a pedestal and teaches his disciples is dead. A new type of guru (a "nuru" if you will) is emerging. This "nuru" is open, raw and not afraid to admit she has faults. She shares her experiences, and helps others who are going through what she's been through. She might not heal you overnight, but her story helps you feel less alone on your journey. This vulnerability makes her real and relatable.

So please, drop the facade, take off the mask and share your story. You never know who you might heal.

By Bethany Butzer, Ph.D.
http://www.bethanybutzer.com/