Kevin Hansen is the author of the bestselling “Secret Regrets: What if you had a Second Chance?” book, and creator of the www.SecretRegrets.com project.
Father’s Day has a way of reminding us of the important things we want to say, should say, or should have said to our fathers. For some, expressing ourselves comes easy. For others, it can be so painfully difficult, that the words that need to be said have never been spoken to the men that need to hear them.
Kevin Hansen has created a safe environment for people to anonymously confess the biggest regrets of their lives. Many of the regrets focus on the relationships between children and their parents – specifically fathers.
For Father’s Day, Hansen has scoured the 25,000+ regrets that have been confessed to him on SecretRegrets.com, and shares seven of the most heartfelt “Dear Dad” secret regrets ever submitted:
“Dear Dad, I regret the day I left you and moved into Mom's house. I was 15 and wanted to be in the household with fewer rules. I can still see how sad your face was. You had recently lost your wife, and now the last of your 4 daughters was walking away from you too! I regret how selfish I was ... and it continues to haunt me.” Female, age 32
“Dear Dad, I regret that I never told you I loved you until you were dying. I regret thinking I had a horrible childhood. You worked so hard to take care of my brothers and me. I regret hating you for keeping such a close eye on me in my teenage years. You were the only one who believed in me, and the only person who loved me enough to push me to do better. You made me into the person I am today. I love you so much and I wish I could take back every mean thing I ever said to you. I regret the day I had to take you off life support and realize all this.” Female, age 23
“Dear Dad, I used to regret the fact that you left us. The fact that you left me alone to deal with the destruction that you had left behind. I used to regret that you didn’t work harder just for me, so you could have saved my dream of having my mom and dad together. I used to regret the fact that you broke ‘our’ family. But now I don’t regret it. I understand now that I am older, that everything happens for a reason, and that even though things have changed, you still love me dearly.” Female, age 17
“Dear Dad, If I had a second chance, I would never have let my search for my ‘real father’ consume me. It blinded me to what I already had. A real father. I’m so sorry. If there wasn’t 15 years of hate on my part toward you, I would tell you I’m sorry, I love you, and thank you for being a real father to a boy who wanted one so badly. You’re amazing to me and my mother, which is something he couldn’t be. What’s worse is you have always been so nice about EVERYTHING. That makes it hard for me to be anywhere around you, only because I know my feelings are unjust. I’m sorry. I constantly think of ways to make up for my anger. I just can never go through with them. I don’t want you to be angry. I don’t want you to know how I really feel because if I were to lose you ... the only father figure that I ever had, the only male that means anything to me ... I’m not sure if I could handle that. So I keep up my lies, and it kills me every time.” Male, age unknown
“Dear Dad, I regret the way I made you feel when I was younger. The things I said to you, the tantrums I threw. I was young and stupid, and couldn’t handle the things she was telling me. She was in the wrong, not you. A 12-year-old shouldn’t hear the things she told me. You never acted the way she did and never tried to manipulate my feelings towards her. She pulled it day in and day out. I regret believing her. I regret that I didn’t just ask you about it. I regret that you think the reason why I’m so messed up is because of you. You are my rock. You always have been, and always will be, there for me. I need you, and I need you to know how sorry I am. I regret that I can’t say these things to you. I know you would forgive me, but I’ll never forgive myself. Out of all of my regrets, the one I wish I could take back the most is making you feel like a bad father. Dad, I love you more than words can express. I hope you forgive me.” Female, age 20
“Dear Dad, I know you hate your job, and you haven’t quit yet because of us. I know being a single parent struggling to pay the mortgage is hard, and even harder when you have to worry about your daughter who got pregnant and your son who’s close to dropping out of high school. I regret not saying thank you and letting you think that my brother’s mistakes and mine are you fault. You’ve been a great dad to two screw-ups. I regret that my brother and I didn’t listen to what you said two years ago, and now we still act ungrateful. But that’s so far from the truth. We love you. You are the most important person in our lives.” Female, age 17
“Dear Dad, I regret never forgiving you for cheating on Mom. This lack of forgiveness has caused me to no longer be ‘Daddy’s Girl.’ I regret never doing the things fathers and daughters should have done together when I was a kid because I was too angry with you and wanted you to die. I regret throwing away the best relationship I ever had with you when I was 14.” Female, age 21
Learn more about the Secret Regrets project at www.SecretRegrets.com , and check out the bestselling Secret Regrets book on Amazon, or the ebook on Kindle or Nook.