Adina grew up in the Arctic – Nunavut of Northern Canada – before moving to its opposite extreme – San Diego, California, where she continues the singing and art she began at home. Her voice will melt icecaps. So will her words. Read on to be inspired by her story and wisdom…
Diana: What was it like growing up in Nunavut?
Adina: Lets see, it was definitely an adventure, I used to tell people that it felt like you didn’t just “grow up” there, you survived it. And after I moved away I said things like, “I’ve done my time there...” I thought of it for so long like a prison of not only geographical but social isolation. But now that I’ve been away for a few years, all those things that bothered me are what I miss the most. I miss the quietness, the visiting...the hours and hours of nothing to do. Nunavut seems to be a place where time doesn’t really exist; and that’s something I've come to really appreciate.
It was hard for me because I was one of the only half-white kids in town and I had these big blues eyes, I was a bit of a dork, I was clumsy in gym glass, I had really good grades and on top of it all both my parents were pastors of a church. I just didn’t fit in on any level for so many years. It was just like childhood anywhere I suppose, where you just happen to be the kid that always gets picked last for the baseball team or whatever...all the other kids were normal Nunavut kids, they stayed out as long as they wanted in the summertime, and I still had a curfew. It was so embarrassing to walk home at 10 pm at night and see all these seven and six year olds playing ball outside and riding bikes, because its summer and the sun is out and most all the other parents gave their kids the freedom to enjoy the endless sunlight, because our summers were so short anyway everyone takes advantage of it while it lasts, but for me it was always home by ten and in bed not to long after, summertime or not.
Growing up in Nunavut you see great tragedy and great joy in intensely close quarters, we see so much sadness. There are a lot of suicides that take place and there is nothing that seems to dissipate the awful, impact it has on a community. Losing one young life in a small isolated town of 800 people is hard enough, but some years we lost three or four of our beloved friends and you just start to feel hopeless after a while, even the most hopeful kids are affected. We do have a lot of social issues and growing up there its hard to escape its looming grip but on another hand, mostly we have all been raised in “old world” ways, where we respect our elders, we don’t talk back to our parents, if an older person walks in a room and you are in the only available seat, you offer them your seat...if you have some meat and a friend comes over to visit, you share what you have. We mostly never lock our doors and almost never knock before entering. Before visiting, you never need to call...if there is a death in a community, everything shuts down, even if it just for a few hours, the whole town pays its respects, and the stores still close their doors on Sundays. I love that! Something about those old traditions just instills something in you that never leaves. There are just so many beautiful aspects of our culture that shine through all the darkness, I really believe I was fortunate to have been raised in Nunavut, its taken me a few years to appreciate all the good, but I’ve come to a place where I can actually see more positive than negative about where I grew up, there really is no place like home, and where else can you get some good frozen caribou meat for lunch?
Diana: When did you realize you have a musical talent? And when did you decide to be a musician?
Adina: I’m not sure exactly, I know there were definitely phases, I’ve been singing since I was three...you know how that goes, my mom would call the local radio station and she’d hand me the phone and day “sing to your grandma” and I would sing my heart out not realizing the whole town was listening! And then I was the typical pastors daughter, singing on Sunday morning and doing “specials”, but there came a time that I started to really not enjoy singing and I think that came from the pressure to perform, there was no joy or authenticity in it, and I just stopped singing for a long time. Somewhere along the way I think I lost my confidence for a while, I was 13 and heard other singers and thought, there’s no way I could ever measure up but I realized it was something I couldn’t escape, if I went through an especially hard emotional time...songs would just come out of me and I would just start singing or writing, and I noticed after a while the lyricism of my heart was something I really couldn’t bottle up, it was something inside that had to be expressed.
I started singing in the shower, the typical closet musician with quiet aspirations, and then once I moved away from home to this other eccentric little northern town (Yellowknife), they had this wonderful night life, where musicians and artists just seemed to gather on quiet Monday nights and play in front of each other on open mic nights, and one night I just got the courage to get up there...and for the first time, I sang my own songs, it was truly an inspired moment. I did it accapella, and sang one of my poems...and for a moment the whole place just stopped in their tracks, the noisy glasses quieted, the conversations slowed to a hum and then silence, and then people stopped and turned and took notice, and I think it was those kinds of moments, where you realize, you just might have something worth listening to, something important or even just something sweet that sounds good and makes people happy. And even if you don’t have the best voice in the world, you realize its not about the perfect sound, its about the music, its about having something that’s your own and people appreciate that.
Diana: What does music mean to you?
Adina: Music means something different to me now that it ever has, for me its all about the ears and the heart of God, as long as he’s listening and he’s got a smile on his face, than I’m happy with what I am creating. I also really enjoy music that makes people happy and not just the kind of happy that comes from up-beat music, but music that communicates heaven to people, we have so much oppression and depression that’s imposed on us in our lives, I think its important that music uplifts us and brings us joy.
Diana: Do you think music can inspire and motivate others? How has it changed who you are as a person and artist?
Adina: I absolutely think so, music is inspiring because its coming out of peoples hearts and whatever is in your heart comes out of your mouth, whether your singing or just having a conversation with someone, what’s going on inside is going to end up coming out. I think the musicians that have inspired met the most are people that I’ve known, not huge artists just musicians doing music for the sake of the music, they play and create songs because they just can’t help themselves. One way I’ve been affected by music, is one time this young girl that I know, got up and played a song on Sunday morning at church and she played a song and it was by no means perfect, she played clumsy chords and blushed, but she just smiled and kept going, there was something about what she did that was just so amazing to me...for so long I wouldn’t put myself in a position that made me vulnerable to criticism or even in a place where there was the potential to make a mistake in front of a crowd of people, and I just saw the raw beauty and bravery of what she was doing and that inspired me, and I realized that no matter what, even if you make mistakes in front of people and play the wrong chord or sing a sour note, if you want to do something in life, not just in music, you have to be willing to put yourself out there. I think to this day, that Sunday was one that will stay with me for the rest of my life, when she got up there I had this personal revelation, that I was holding back in life because I was afraid of what people might think if I messed up, I was afraid not to be perfect and I realized it was paralyzing me...and from then on, I made the decision to never let that frame of mind impose itself on me ever again, and that its better to be on stage making mistakes, than sitting down the rest of your life.
Diana: What have been some of your own major influences?
Adina: I think the first influences were the Pentecostal gospel songs I heard my whole life growing up in the second pew of the glad tidings church, even just the super charged emotional atmosphere of a Pentecostal church is something that is almost musical in its own way. When my uncle Louie would take the worship service on Sunday night, he’d get one song and sing it for twenty minutes! His brow would be dripping with sweat, his face would get so red, he’d always have his eyes closed tight and he’d strum his guitar with everything he had in him...it so unforgettable, that kind of true, pure worship, nothing for me is more inspiring than when people sing to God with all they’ve got, and nothing else matters but the ears of heaven, that is so beautiful to me, I don’t think anything in the world could even being to touch that realm of music for me.
Because I was so isolated in Nunavut I didn’t have access to much, besides Much Music and the CD selection at the local Northern store, but this one summer a friend of mine gave me a mix tape, she was from out of town and the tape had a demo cut of a Jewel song (before she made it big), it also had these wonderful songs by Ani Defranco and other really amazing female artists, and I just played that tape over and over and emulated the vocal stylings as best I could, and when I would hit a wall, I didn’t care, I just kept trying and I knew then that I wanted to sing no matter how hard it seemed. That same summer Alanis came out with “Jagged Little Pill” and I just fell in love, at that time no one was doing what she was doing, she was so raw and her voice was so emotional, it was just all guts and love, and I just fell in love with raw emotional singing...oh and when I was even younger my best friend and I would sing Johnny Cash and Kenny Rogers songs, and then I got into Neil Young, so there is this funny little side of me that seems to love the chorus line, I think those small town country influences of Nunavut, made me the chorus queen. I can always write a chorus but getting the rest of the song can sometimes be a challenge for me.
Diana: What helps you when you’re going through a hard time?
Adina: I sometimes hesitate to answer questions like this because a lot of times people automatically think it’s a religious crutch, when I answer “my relationship with God,” because it’s something much deeper. Knowing that he not only loves me but that he's listening to me, that’s a huge part of my life and he gives me the ability to function. I seriously wouldn’t have the capacity to cope with life without him. Its really a love relationship, I am captivated by him and I love the way he thinks and his way of doing things, its like his simplicity is so wonderful, I love that I can open the bible and read something that truly impacts my emotions, things like love, joy, peace and forgiveness...its so uncomplicated but so many people still struggle with it, people want to stop off at all their preconceived ideas but for me, Jesus truly is a savior, no cliché, I really needed saving.
No one gets a PHD in loving or forgiving, no one really gives themselves to those things but to me, they are the most important things in life, and they are the things that get you through the day, practically and spiritually. I used to be so complicated mentally and emotionally, and there was such chaos in my life and in my heart, that once I surrendered to God, I realized how wonderful his ways are...he says to love when the rest of the world is telling you to hate, he says to forgive when everything around you is telling you to get revenge, he says all these amazingly eternal things that I can never hope to grasp in a thousand lifetimes, and yet the concepts are so simple. You know? I think I will never get over the beauty of his word and his way of doing things, I will always be captivated by love, and love is what dissipates the madness inside. When all the things in life are trying to assault me, I just yield to love and just trust.
I think its also really important to have friends that love you and care for you and understand you, and keep your family close, no matter how aggravating they can be at times, its so important not to isolate yourself when your going through a hard time. It’s sort of our first instinct, to shut people out but that’s the last thing you should do.
Diana: Any words to live by?
Adina: Love. You have to look at things through the eyes of love, listen with the ears of love...react with the heart of love. Love will never fail you. Love isn’t self-seeking, its not easily offended, its not touchy. Love is strong, love is forgiving, love is patient, its all those things I think we’re searching for...its not some romantic, mushy thing. Love truly is what will get you through the day, not just getting by, but truly living a life full of abundance, and inner richness. When it gets hard to breathe, just love.
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