My name is Stefania and I am now 19 years old. I was 13 when I first started realizing I was dealing with something different and unexplainable. I didn’t tell anyone how I was feeling or why I had such fears about large groups of people. I played a new me, a normal me for three more years. In high school I started seeing spots and bright colours which I knew no one else noticed. I could be walking down the hall and suddenly I felt as if I was being watched. One day I had this strange feeling like I was sinking into the floor and when my friend tried to help me up and hug me, I hit him. It felt like a million hands were pulling and pushing me around when he touched me.
I just wanted it to stop – for someone to tell me what was going on – and that I’d be okay. I was in therapy and treatment when I found out about 2 small safe spaces called mindyourmind in the downtown mall. I met nice people there who didn’t judge me based on a label. They gave me a card with an eccentric drawing on it so I asked for two. I ended up laminating these cards together and using them when my episodes came. I focused on the drawings, the words and what they had meant to the artist. It helped me focus and I didn’t fear what was going to happen next because the picture wasn’t going anywhere. I am glad that from then on, I have been off of medication for over two years now, I have a beautiful daughter, a job and I’m going to school to finish where I left off. I’ve realized that no one is normal and that it’s ‘crazy’ not to get help when you really need it.